Thursday, April 16, 2009

How to Write an Eye-Catching Profile by Cherie Burbach Guest Post

I am glad to welcome Cherie Burbach to ReadingMama. Cherie is the author of the book Internet Dating Is Not Like Ordering A Pizza. Wether you are dating or not, I think that you will find what she has to say about profiles very helpful especially since the internet is full of social networks that one has to write profiles for.

How to Write an Eye-Catching Profile
© Cherie Burbach 2009

When Internet daters tell me that they've tried dating online and given up, one of two things is usually the problem: their approach or their profile. Today, let's talk in greater detail about how to write a profile that gets results.

One of the biggest mistakes daters make is rushing through a profile just to get it up. One reason they do this is because they are so enthusiastic to search for their dream guy or girl, they neglect their own profile. I've even seen a few folks with near empty profiles actually email people for a date.

While this enthusiasm is admirable, it actually sets up new online daters for failure. Why? Because without a profile that truly reflects who you are you won't be able to attract the right people to you.

Even if you aren't the best writer, you can still craft words that will reflect your personality. The key? Writing about one or two things you are passionate about. If you focus on a couple of your favorite areas, rather than making a laundry list of things that end up meaningless, your natural personality will come through.

The tendency some daters have is to write a list of things they enjoy doing, so it sounds like they are going to the grocery store rather than trying to attract their match. The reason that strategy is all wrong is because in order to get someone interested in you, he or she needs to get a sense of your personality. So rather than listing several items, choose one or two and go into detail about why you enjoy that particular hobby or activities. Here are a couple examples from my book, Internet Dating is Not Like Ordering a Pizza:

Instead of saying "I play tennis twice a week" say something like:

"Playing tennis is the one time each week where I get to focus on myself. No
work problems, no family issues, just me, the ball, and the little white net."

Here's another example:
Instead of saying "I'd like to see France one day" say something like:

"Architecture and culture intrigue me. That's why I'd like to visit Paris one day. What
could be better than walking along the same streets Napoleon, Hemmingway, and Colette all
strolled down as well?"

In describing your hobbies, go into some detail as to why you enjoy them. For example, if you have a favorite type of restaurant or place to hang out, say something like:

"I enjoy sushi and Thai food especially, but hey - a quaint little place with a great atmosphere
will always lure me in. I like the charming, dimly lit places where you're about six inches from
the people next to you and then end up talking to them throughout dinner as if they're long
lost friends."

With these examples, do you notice how the personality of the writer comes through? It's that spark that will draw someone in. We're all interesting people once you get to know us, but with online dating you've got to give someone a glimpse of that spirit before they meet you in person. That's one of the keys to attracting the right person to you.


Cherie Burbach used her experience with meeting her husband online to pen At the Coffee Shop, a humorous look at the world of Internet dating. Cherie went on over 60 coffee dates in just six months. She met lots of great people and one of those turned out to be the guy she would marry just one year later.

She is the Dating Feature Writer for Suite101, an online magazine with over 10 million views monthly, and also the author of three poetry books, including A New Dish and The Difference Now. Her latest, Father's Eyes, has received the 2008 Editor's Choice Award by Allbooks Review. Cherie blogs at Jennifer Lopez, Jessica and Ashlee Simpson, Career and Kids, Celebrity Apprentice, Gossip on Sports, and Diabetes Notes.

For poets looking for a review of their book, check out Cherie's new site Bonjour Poetry Reviews.

Readers have resonated with Cherie's honest and inspirational "This I Believe" essay, which is the second-most popular out of over 32,000 entries on the NPR website. For more information, please visit Cherie's website at or

About Internet Dating Is Not Like Ordering A Pizza:

Have you become frustrated with Internet dating?
If you've tried online dating and given up, or even if you thought the Internet wasn't right for you, this book will give you the courage to try again, this time armed with specific illustrations on what really works - from the profile through the dating stage. Don't waste another minute wondering why some people seem to have Internet dating success while you're still waiting for a response to your online ad. Through dozens of concrete examples, dating expert Cherie Burbach will show you how to write an eye-catching profile, search for, and meet the right person online.
Happy Reading


J.W. Nicklaus said...

When I've tried internet dating I've always avoided the 'laundry list' approach. I try to make the post interesting to read and allude to a few points of interest about me in the process.

I've found that this approach tends to attract people more likely to be compatible--they tend to be much more on my level.

I know there are people who clearly want, or even need, a list. I find that listed items, over the course of conversation, come out in the wash eventually ;^)

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Wanda said...

You know, alot of the concepts sound like they could be used in the "real" dating world too! I bet shy people could pick up a few pointers reading this one.

Me, I'm already hitched ... have been for twenty years! Just dropping in to say hello. :)


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Well, my name is Eva, I am enjoying my motherhood spending wonderful times with my baby. Whenever I get time I used to surf internet because I also run a dating website, according to my knowledge for the right person, online dating can be a very effective alternative to traditional dating. Not only does it provide the convenience of getting to know someone in front of your computer, but it also will help ensure that you meet someone who shares similar interests. It's important to keep in mind that there are a number of different things that one can do to increase the chances of successful dating in the online world.

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